Yesterday while my husband went on a motorcycle run with over 100 other bikers, I stayed home and weeded my garden. I love my garden however right now my garden is FILLED with grass, grass with roots all the way to the other side of the universe! Weeding my garden is not for sissies! If grass grows in the garden portion of your yard it's an absolute impossibility to EASILY extract that grass from the garden! Grass has roots and those roots are as long as the tentacles on an octopus! Those roots absolutely will not give up easily on their hold of the earth below eye level! To extract the grass from the garden, I need to take a shovel and use all my limited strength to push that shovel down through dirt that doesn't give and then TRY to dislodge even an iota of dirt so I can then get down with my claw implement and then TRY as hard as I can to pull up a tiny section of grass and remove it from the garden! In a man's world this is ball busting work! Being a 62 year old female, I can only say this is ENTIRE BODY busting work! This process takes HOURS and HOURS of un-fun time. Let me say again, "Gardening is not for sissies!" By the time my man got home last night, I was soaked with sweat and covered in dirt. My hair was completely stuck to my head at all angles. There were blackened rivulets of sweat cascading down my body. I TOLD MY HUSBAND that to MAKE IT SEEM like I was actually WITH HIM on his all day Harley ride instead of down on my hands and knees having an all day grass battle,that I wore ALL of his HARLEY LEATHERS while gardening! I told him I wore his leather chaps, his leather skull cap, his leather vest, his leather gloves and his leather Harley jacket the whole time I dug up that diabolical grass! I told him that I SOAKED all of his leathers from the inside out with my sweat but that he was not to worry because the leathers were all in the basement, hanging on hangers, DRIPPING from the inside. DRIP DRIP DRIP. He said, "That's nice dear." I said "I like to feel close to you at all times my love so I wear your things!!" I was so hot and so completely burned out after an all day marathon of gardening, I was forced to come into the house and take a shower and immediately prepare a hot fudge sundae for myself which included a lot of whipped cream and a cherry on top! I was at peace again as I ate my sundae. My husband didn't get any dinner last night because I just wasn't up to my live in chef mode after all that gardening. My husband is a saint who lives with a crazy woman. He made himself his own ice cream tribute and that was HIS supper. He knows when the little woman has been gardening all day it's best to keep a code of silence and friendliness around the house until the next day. He's going to need some breakfast today when he wakes up and there is a lack of groceries in our cupboards. Maybe I can go get more of that dastardly grass in my garden and mix it up with some essence of eggs or something and pass it off as some type of 'breakfast greens'. Did I mention I hate cooking. Sometimes I hate it even more than pulling that beastly grass out of my garden.
